Warmth

When I lay my head on her shoulders, I felt a sudden flood of warmth that I've been trying to remember.

She looked so exhausted, teaching in the evening sessions now. It pains me to see her in such a condition after a long time. But I can still feel the enthusiasm, the excitement, the energy projecting from her. I remember no matter how frustrated or angry or disappointed or whatever inhumane feeling heaped upon her, she'll still stand tall and speak out. Loud. She's strict like there's no tomorrow. She makes sure we do not cross the line. She literally keeps an eye on you.

But it is these things that made us who we are now. We are independent, strong and fairly capable in judgements and handling novel situations. She leaves decisions for us in which we have no choice but to make one. She taught us how to be masters of our own lives, not mere followers. There are minor and barely noticeable things that she did that affects us greatly but that does not mean that we do not appreciate them. Looking at how she watches us grow, I can see that she misses us too.

I know that it is repetitive and we are all probably bored of hearing it, but we do not know what we are missing until we really lost them. I lost this sense of security, this notion, this feeling, knowing that she'll always be there to advise us what to do. I do understand that I cannot rely on her forever. I left the bounds for more than two years now and I have to learn how to stand up on my own. Just like her.

I remember how she said she's very proud of us. I've never been happier when I hear those words. Because of that, I will hold on to those words. Not letting her down.

Today, the meeting, though brief but it is very memorable. I am very glad I am able to meet her.

When I saw her, she reminded me of me. I cannot express my gratitude in words because it's simply overflowing. I am happy. I am happy. I am very happy.

I hope that despite all the challenges that she is facing now and is about to face, she'll be able to stand tall like she always do. I hope that she will not over exhaust herself. I hope that she will take very good care of herself.

Lots of love to her.